Life's Little Nuggets

  So, Clients, it's been a hot minute since I checked in and wrote a blog! I have been completing a master's program in Empowerment Life Coaching and a Counseling and Mental Health Diploma from POBA. This is not my entire life! While educating myself, I also do self-care and continue to practice what I preach! The other day, I ordered from one of my favorite vendors, Cratejoy.com . I purchased a 180 Degree Box.  https://www.cratejoy.com/subscription-box/180deg-box/?cjt=account~my_subscriptions~~1~180%20~search-bar     There were all sorts of delightful items included in my order. The one I'm going to talk about is: These reminded me of a wonderful safe Group I participated in on Fridays at "Robin's Hope" called, "Seeking Safety". We drew numbers corresponding to quotes, tools, or even Steps that helped us that day and throughout the week. Anyway, I shuffled this deck, and the first card I drew was: So how can you invite more "Bliss" into y...

  Good morning!!!!       As I'm doing the last course of my master's Empowerment Life Coaching Certification through Transformation Academy, the topic of Boundary Violations Against Yourself was reintroduced.   Tasha-Ina Church, the instructor, referenced Marshall Goldman's "Triggers". She does a beautiful illustration of how each of us can adapt Marshall's checklist and scale from 1-10 for our own lives asking ourselves questions like: 1. How did do when it came to meeting my goals? 2. Did I treat myself well? 3. Did I take the time off I needed to? She also suggests we can check in on a weekly basis. I found this so relevant to my current life. I'm able to not answer calls after a certain designated hour. I'm also able to take time for fun in my life!  This boundary work I've done and continue to do in 12 Step, Trauma Communities, Church Communities, and with a number of loving friends and family members. It helps me establish my yard and respect...

  https://www.yourtango.com/experts/psychicmediumreadings-bykristine/why-too-much-self-sacrifice-negatively-impacts-your-life#Sacrificing%20and%20Being%20A%20Martyr%20Is%20Not%20Noble. As a codependent daughter raised in a culture where giving and helping was praised, demanded, obligatory, and even in most cases expected, I learned to jump in when I saw or heard trouble, feelings, or problems. This also was modeled for me by my Mama. As I'm taking this Course on Self-Care/Self-Love, here are some wonderful reminders Transformation Coach, Natalie Rivera, narrates on "Sacrificial Harms Done by Helping". These are so relatable and part of my healing journey.  1. Making the person you are helping feel guilty because it matters to you. The person you are helping isn't even asking for help. they are just venting or talking about a problem. 2. Your children learn the pattern of self-sacrifice by you as a parent giving up your dreams. You model that behavior to them. Instead,...

  This morning as I was listening to my course in Self-Care/Self-Love, I remembered a beautiful opportunity to build my own safe tribe and community through Robin's Hope called, "Seeking Safety". Each week, we drew a number, that corresponded to a card. These cards represented famous quotes, 12-step Skills, and simple CBT skills. Each week Members showed up and discussed what these cards meant to us, and how they could affect us in our trauma? How could we use these skills to better cope?  Microsoft Word - Seeking Safety Coping Skills Reprint English.docx (cfsslo.org) This video today was about using affirmation cards.  Draw one from your own deck. Process it for a week and answer what does this card mean for you? What "aha" moment came up after focusing on it for a week? Find a safe tribe to share these cards and discoveries with.  Here are some affirmation cards to get you on your journey!!!!

 As I continue my Master's Empowerment Coaching Program in the Transformation Academy, in the "Self-Love/Self-Care Life Coaching", I was introduced to my own practice of Self-Care Mantras and my personal Morning Routine to jumpstart my day.     I begin my day very early! I have a pit bill mix who rises somewhere between 3:30-4:00 am. (Weekends are not a free pass). I take her out for a walk where I surrender my will to HP, release my character defects, and express gratitude for the day before (the people that called, the lessons I learned, the safety of my son at work during the heat, the ease of communication with normally difficult people, and for life itself. Next, I read my daily meditations. I move on to my   www.makeuseof.com/finch-self-care-widget-pet-app/ . There I can choose writing prompts, mantras, and exercises, set intentions for my day, read for fun, clean an area of a room, reach out to a friend to let them know I'm thinking of them, and look...

  So, followers,     I began my new Course in Self-Care Life Coaching. It brought up an old behavior I knew so well in my childhood and carried long into my adult years... stuffing my feelings. From an early age, I learned by watching and picking up social cues that certain feelings weren't allowed or could escalate an already heated or chaotic situation. Therefore, I pushed them down and resented the person(s) who I at that young emotionally immature age couldn't allow myself to express them. I went to other people who were not so safe and shared myself and thought I was accepted, loved, and wouldn't be abandoned.     The imbalance of bottling my feelings caused me such pain and physical illness, emotional setbacks, and even spiritual doubt. I would get into relationships with people over and over which led me down a path of hiding behind a mask; I was not expressing my feelings or I was overly expressing them trying to change the other person I was in a relati...

Good morning, followers!!    Over the weekend one of my beautiful Sponsees asked to do Shadow work. That led me down a necessary path of looking for the best and newest books, worksheets, and workbooks to explore and offer her.  I found a free workbook, "Wisdom of the Shadow Shadow Workbook Journal" to delve into deeper. Wisdom+of+the+Shadow+Workbook (1).pdf Also, I found a book, "The Secret Shadow" by Debbie Ford, that I purchased for myself as it was an author that I love who puts any topic into simplistic yet concrete examples of her own experience. I smiled as I bought it from Amazon. My brother, Anthony, who died in April of this year, loved her books too and would pick them up at a used bookstore and pass them on to friends to enjoy. The last jewel of my journey this morning was this assessment of the 9 ways we self-sabotage and receive my results. Assessments | Positive Intelligence  Very eye-opening and in so many ways, I've grown, and in so many ways, I...